Monthly Archives: January 2014

11 Things Atheists Couldn’t Do Because They Didn’t Believe In God

11 Things Atheists Couldn’t Do Because They Didn’t Believe In God.

I know this does not fit into the direction that I wish for this blog to take but this article had me livid after reading it. Can believers really be this naive????

Please share your comments on this article, I think it will make for some very interesting conversation.

He that picks up stick shall surely die

This story is pretty cut and dry, or so they say. I will let you decide at the end just how cut and dry it really is.

And while the children of Israel were in the wilderness, they found a man that gathered sticks upon the sabbath day. And they that found him gathering sticks brought him unto Moses and Aaron, and unto the congregation. And they put him in ward, because it was not declared what should be done to him. And they Lord said unto Moses, the man shall surely be put to death: all the congregation shall stone him with stones without the camp. And all the congregation brought him without the camp, and stones him with stones, and he died; as the Lord commanded MosesNumbers15: 32-36.

I have some issues with this story which should not comes as a surprise to anyone who follows this blog. Let’s first point out that the children of Israel needed to mind their own damned business! What business of there’s is this man picking up sticks?

They capture the man and bring him before Moses. I wonder it they asked the man about his religious beliefs  or if he even believed in God. Maybe he didn’t believe in the Sabbath. Hell they didn’t have the wherewith all  to ask his name. He is known as ‘a man’. Well, does the man have a name? Where is he from? Does he have a wife and kids? Is he gathering sticks needed to prepare a meal for his family? If it is winter, is he gathering to stay warm? We know none of this. All we know is those nosy ass Israelite’s can’t keep their noses out of other people’s business!

So now, this man, that we know absolutely nothing about, has been captured against his will and is standing in front of Moses. Who made Moses the king of the Jews? Maybe they crucified the wrong man! Not knowing what to do, Moses and Aaron had him jailed. So here is what we know thus far. The unnamed man has been taken against his will, brought before men he does not know (Moses and Aaron), thrown in jail, and what is his crime? Oh that’s right! He picked up a stick! How dare he!

The God of Love tells Moses that the man shall be stoned to death. Really? So much for a fair hearing and a fair trial. Apparently all you had to do is listen to the voice in your head and do as it says. Just as an invisible God commanded, the people murdered the man by burying him up to his neck and stoning him to death. That’s right, that’s how they stoned people in Biblical times.

I can’t help but wonder about the man’s family sitting there waiting for daddy to arrive home. Did anyone get a message to them telling them that God had him killed? Did God drop by and explain the man’s heinous crime? Nope, not a word of this in the Bible. God and Moses basically gave them big ‘F-you’ and started created fringes on their garments. Read a little farther in the chapter if your interested in how they went from murder into sewing.

So what’s the moral to this story? God sucks as human relations! He would rather you starve to death and freeze to death than to do something to prevent it on his holy day. But hey, God is love, God is love.

Onan refuses to ejaculate inside his brother’s wife

Welcome Back! Today’s post is a real head scratcher. It definitely left me scratching my head.

All strapped in? Here we go…

This is one of those stories that most Christians are unaware of its existence. I was talking with a very good friend today that just happens to be a Christian and he hadn’t heard of the story of Onan, so this should definitely be a shocker.

 And Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the Lord; and the Lord slew him. And Judah said unto Onan, Go in unto thy brother’s wife, and marry her, and raise up seed to thy brother. And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother’s wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother.And the thing which he did displeased the Lord: wherefore he slew him also (Genesis 38:7-10)

After reading the above scriptures I was left wondering…What did Er do that made God call him wicked, so wicked in fact that God killed him? Notice that God does not provide what wicked acts occurred, instead he left it completely open to interpretation. So lets see…Did he get drunk and impregnate his daughters? Nope, that was Lot. Did he get drunk, lay around naked and curse his son for covering his nakedness? Nope, that was Noah. Did he kill innocent women and children? Nope, that was God. So what wicked act did he perform? I guess we will never know. It is another one of God’s many murders throughout the Bible. The fact that God killed Er and gave no explanation to his followers is not the insane part of this story. But one would definitely think that God would mention what he did to help his followers know what NOT to do. Then again, why would he do that?

As the above story goes, God, after killing Er for his unknown wickedness, thinks it is a good idea to have Judah tell Er’s brother Onan to shag his brother’s wife, marry her and raise up seed to his brother. In other words, as you are screwing your dead brothers wife make sure you fill up her womb with your seed then raise the child. Hey! Wait a minute! I think I just figured it out! Maybe Er’s wickedness was the horrible sin of being impotent. Just a thought!

Continuing on…

Ladies allow me to ask a hypothetical question. How quickly would you be to spread your legs for you brother-in-law after the brutal murder of your husband? I would think that any lady with any morals would say “never”.  So what does this say about Er’s wife? Was she a woman who gave it out willingly or was it taken by force? We will see in future post that God does not oppose rape. The Bible does not say whether she gave it up willingly or against her will. All we know at this point is that Onan shagged his sister-in-law.

Onan admitted to knowing that the seed should not be his. So why bother shagging your brother’s wife? Did he go through with it because he saw what God did to his brother? Was he shagging her under duress? None the less, he goes through with the act. When it came time to release his seed into his brother’s wife he pulls out and releases it on the ground. This really pisses off God. God is so angry that he kills Onan.

So what’s the moral to this twisted ass story? If God tells you to shag your brother’s wife you better do it! Oh, and you can forget about pulling out. It has deadly consequences.

The Flood: The Mass Murder of Millions

Imagine if you will a 600 year old man standing in the middle of a desert. The temperatures are reaching well above one hundred degrees. He is hot, tired and probably pretty damned thirsty. Then all of a sudden a loud voice rains down from the heavens, “Noah! I want you to build me a big ass boat.”

Now that I have your attention, in my last post (The Story of Lot) I asked the question “can this get anymore insane?” In fact, it does, hence the flood. So, like the last time, strap in because we are about to get this insanity on the road.

And God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually.And it repented the Lord that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart (Genesis 6: 5-6). The honeymoon is over, God is no longer satisfied with the creation that he claimed was very good. He is now ‘grieved’ at his heart. I didn’t know spirits had a heart but I can play along.  Apparently there was too much sex and drinking going on and God was not happy! We all know the last thing God wants is for us to have fun. He expects us to spiritually castrate ourselves and be wholly subservient. Call me crazy but I think he has a very long wait.

Anyway, God isn’t happy, so what great idea did he come up with to bring himself happiness? You guessed it! Kill em all! Apparently God is in need of a mulligan; he want’s a do-over but what about all those pesky humans he created? That’s easy…drown them all and the animals too. Wait? What? The animals? What did they do? Were the cows roaming the streets shagging all the horses? Did those blood thirsty koala bears cause a ruckus?

This is mass murder on a grand scale folks. However, being a rational thinking person, I have a few questions. Did God in his all-knowing-ness not see this coming? Do you think God had the ability to stop all the evilness in the world without drowning all the innocent children, infants and animals? If so, why would an all loving God choose death by drowning? Can you imagine the feeling of gasping for air and choking just before passing out? Can you imagine the panic that must set in when you realize that there is no hope, you are going to drown to death? Imagine all the innocent babies that experienced that exact thing. How can you bring yourself to call your God a God of love? Is it love when a mother drowns her children in a bathtub? If she said God told her to do it, should she get away with the murder?  Is that any different from what God did on a much larger scale? But yet you call him Love. You ought to be ashamed of yourself and you have the audacity to call me a hypocrite.

Continuing on…

Am I the only one that has realized that God hadn’t prescribed any rules or commandments at this stage? Why would God punish them for breaking rules when there are no rules to follow? Seems rather hypocritical to me; give no rules, no laws, no guidance, then murder them all for not having the ability to read his mind. But Hey! God is love, God is love.

Let’s delve a little deeper into the actual story. Noah, a man of great youth being only six hundred years old is told by God (yes, God apparently spoke in audible tones) that he planned to flood the Earth to rid it off all those evil people who had a poor example by their God on how to act. But Noah and his family was to be spared because of his righteousness. All he had to do was build a 450 ft boat for God to house two of every animal including his family. Now, let me pause right here to ask a question. Why is it that God, who spoke everything into existence, cannot build a boat? All he would have to do is say “let there be a big ass boat” and poof  a boat would appear. But I guess it is best to have a man who is over half of a millennium in age to do it. Hey, makes sense to me…NOT!

So now poor Noah is stuck building a boat in the desert. I wonder if God provided all the supplies needed? Of course not, he couldn’t even build a damn boat.

We advance in years and now the boat is complete and the people are mocking Noah because now there’s a boat in the middle of the desert in Palestine. Noah is dog tired from spending many years roaming the desert trying to find trees to use as logs, not to mention making nails and all else that is required to build a huge boat but apparently there is no rest for weary when you are working for God because now he is tasked to collect two of every species for the ark. I wonder if God supplied him a list of all the animals? I remember my Sunday school teacher telling me that God led all the animals to him. Hmm…did God give the Kangaroo’s and koala bears temporary wings to enable them fly to Palestine? How about the poor penguins and polar bears, I bet they were hot as hell. After all, there is only a two hundred degree difference between Antarctica and Palestine.

As you can see this is getting more and more insane with each line. So, lets discuss a few more points and then we will put this insanity to rest.

Food: How did Noah keep the meat needed to feed the carnivores from spoiling? Did they have large refrigerators/freezers on the ark? Surely in that heat the meat would quickly spoil.

Cleaning: Who had the ‘crappy’ job of cleaning up all the excrement left by the animals? I can only imagine how big elephant dung would be, not to mention the horrible smell inside the ark. Maybe they opened the ONLY window on the ark to let some fresh air in. Why would a 450 foot boat only have one small window? Clearly God was not much of an architect.

Behavior: How did they maintain proper behavior of all the animals? After all, wild lions, tigers and bears (oh my!) eat people. It is in their nature to do so. How did they manage to keep all of their digits and limbs?

The flood: God said it will rain for forty day and forty nights. Experts have said that in order for the water to cover Mt. Everest to a depth of twenty-two feet as the Bible states, it would have to rain six inches per second, three hundred sixty inches per minute, and we think it rains hard in the south!

The water recedes:  Why the need to send a dove when Noah and God are on speaking terms?

The ark comes to rest on Mt. Ararat: Really? Of all places God chooses a mountain for the boat to come to rest upon? Assuming this is true, there are millions of dead bodies laying all over the place. What did they do with all the bodies? What did they eat? The flood would have killed all the vegetation. What about the fish? The overwhelmingly amount of fresh water would have completely diluted the salt water. So all the salt water fish would’ve died. Don’t you find it ironic that you can still order salt water fish off the menu?

I know, I know, I know! I am not supposed to think about all this stuff. I’m supposed to accept the blatant lies on faith. I’m to remain dumb and walk around with my God-glasses on and stay focused on God. Well stupidity never suited me well and I threw away my God-glasses years ago, so deal with it!

I will stop here for today. I have provided enough food for thought in this post. More insanity will ensue in the very near future. I look forward to seeing you then. Thanks for reading and please leave any comments you may have.

The Story of Lot

Ask any Christian about Lot and they would tell you how he was a righteous man living in the filth and sin-filled city of Sodom. They would also tell you about how God sent two angels to stay with Lot and his family while God delivered his family out of Sodom just before laying Sodom to waste. Sounds all well and good right? Of course it does because I’ve intentionally left out those parts that make Pastors and Sunday school teachers nervous; those parts that if they taught them would leave their congregation or students looking for the door. Well, lucky for you I’m not afraid to talk about them, so let’s look a little deeper into the Lot story.

Those passages that Pastors and Sunday school teacher’s breeze over when reading the story about Lot we are going to stop and analyze them. Now keep in mind that at no time will I add my own words to the scriptures I am presenting, the scriptures will be presented exactly as stated in the New International Version of the Bible. You may want to strap in, it could be a bumpy ride.

All strapped in? Here we go…

Genesis 19:4-8 says “before they had gone to bed, all the men from every part of the city of Sodom—both young and old—surrounded the house. They called to Lot, “Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us so that we can have sex with them.” Lot went outside to meet them and shut the door behind him and said, “No, my friends. Don’t do this wicked thing. Look, I have two daughters who have never slept with a man. Let me bring them out to you, and you can do what you like with them. But don’t do anything to these men, for they have come under the protection of my roof.”(Were the daughters not under protection?)

Well isn’t that comforting? Nothing says I love my daughters like being willing to send them out as common whores amongst the sex crazed mob. The scripture says ALL the men from Sodom was at the door, I’m not sure of the number, it’s another one of those mysteries the Bible doesn’t provide answers for, but I would venture a guess of over one hundred men. So Lot, in all his righteousness, was willing to send his daughters out to be gang raped by multiple men. Geesh, thanks dad!

I hope you are still strapped in because it gets even bumpier…

After the sex crazed mob leaves with an unfulfilled libido the angels tell Lot that they are there to destroy the city. He is to gather all his family and prepare to leave. Lot, always the righteous servant, does as told and starts gathering his family. He ran into a few complications when he approached his future son-in-laws.

Let’s pause here for a moment shall we?

Are we to understand that Lot had promised his two daughters hand in marriage yet his was perfectly willing to send them out to be raped? Oh! I’m sorry we aren’t supposed to notice that part. Let’s continue…

As I was saying, he ran into a few complications with his future son-in-law’s because they didn’t believe him (v 14). Now why would they not believe a man whom God deemed righteous? Gee, I don’t know, maybe because he was willing to send their future wives out to a sex crazed mob! But anyway, they didn’t believe him so they stayed back. So, Lot along with his family is fleeing Sodom to the town Zoar. One would think that Lot’s daughters would go to their fiance’s and beg them to join them, but nope, not a word about that. Through all the commotion, Lot and his family was told to run and do not look back. At this point fire and brimstone are falling from heaven (v24). Okay, time out! I thought fire and brimstone was in hell. So there is fire and brimstone in heaven too? I can see why so many people are excited about going to heaven…NOT!

Continuing on…

It is at this point that Lot’s wife (name unknown) is murdered for the heinous crime of looking over her shoulder. That’s right; she was turned into a pillar of salt for looking over her shoulder. Now maybe it’s just me, but wouldn’t it be considered natural instinct to turn around when you hear buildings crumbling and people screaming from a horrible fiery death? I would turn around for the mere purpose of making sure a rogue boulder wasn’t coming right at me! But apparently that’s a crime that deserves the death penalty. So, Lot offers his daughters up to be gang raped and God doesn’t blink an eye, not one word of discord from God, hell not even a word of discord from the angels in the house! Yet, Lot’s wife does something as innocent as looking over her shoulder and she is murdered by God. Hmm…let’s compare, shall we? Gang rape vs. looking over one’s shoulder… which do you think is worse?

I cannot speak for you, but in my eyes, that doesn’t seem like a very loving God that is worship worthy.

Join me next time when we look at Noah and the Flood.

The Creation

The Book Of Genesis:
This is the first book of the Bible and the first book of the Torah (for my Jewish friends).  This book contains some of the best known stories of the Old Testament: Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, Noah and the Ark and the Tower of Babel. Let’s start with creation.
The Creation:
 “In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth” (Genesis 1:1) One of the first things I noticed is that it doesnt tell us how he made it. It just says he made it. Apparently the author of the book (some beleive it to be Moses) didn’t feel the details were important OR he made it all up and couldn’t figure it out himself.  Maybe he knew people would be naive enough to beleive it only on faith. Continuing on…
Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters” (1:2). So picture this, God was just hanging out in the darkness. Maybe he became bored and felt he needed something to do. So he grabbed his night vision goggles, because after all he IS in total darkness due to his not creating light out of nothing yet, and got busy creating.
I know I’m just a common man but I have enough common sense to see that the creation story just doesn’t add up. Think about this; God created light and darkness on day one but the sun and stars didn’t appear until day four according to the scripture. Tell me, from whence did the light come? Now if that wasn’t confusing enough, God states that on day five he created the moving creatures that have life, birds and animals from the water that formed the oceans, but in the next chapter it says “and out of the ground the Lord formed every beast of the field and every fowl of the air” (Genesis 2:19). Hold on! Back the truck up! What happened to the creations made of water in chapter one? Excuse me as I take a second and scratch my bald head in confusion.
The Creation of Man (This should be good)
Here we are, it’s day six and God has finally decided to create a human being. “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him” (Genesis 1:27). Hmm…made in his own image eh? If this is true why aren’t we invisible and if we are truly made in his image which of us does he most resemble? Is he black, Asian, middle eastern or white? When looking at the above verse one cannot help but ask; What did he create us from, air? I ask this because in Genesis 2:7 God created us again. I wonder what happened to the first one? “The Lord God formed man of the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul“. Wow! So in the eyes of God man really is dirt. That’s comforting to know…Not! While we are on verse 7, did anyone notice the complete contradiction to chapter one claiming the wild life was  made on day three and man on day six? I didnt at first, but here are the verses for you (Gen 2:4-7) “When the Lord God made the earth and heavens and no shrub of the field had yet appeared on the earth and no plant of the field had yet sprung up – the Lord God formed man form the dust of the ground.
So in chapter one God created man after the wild life and in chapter two man was made before wild life. Which is it, before or after? Maybe I will let you work this one out of your own.
Adam and Eve
As a young boy I remember thinking Adam was the luckiest man alive ( it never occurred to me that he was the ONLY man alive, like I said I was a young boy). He didn’t have to deal with parents, didn’t have to clean his room and was lucky enough to hang out in the garden with a smokin’ hot naked girl. To a hormonal boy, it didn’t get any better than this. Now as an adult I view the story a lot differently.
The Bible teaches that Adam was the first human ever created and he had the garden all to himself, except for all the wild life of course. Now, here is where all the confusion starts to kick in. In Genesis 2:16-17 it says God told Adam of every tree in the garden thou mayest eat freely eat except for the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. If you eat of this tree you will surely die. So, eat of one specific tree and you will die except we know he didn’t. According to scripture he lived over 900 years. Now, in verse 18 God creates Eve. Am I the only one who has noticed that Eve wasn’t created when God laid down the law about the deadly tree? How screwed up is it that Eve is blamed for the fall of man yet she never received the instructions from God?
Let’s back up to the actual creation of Eve for a moment. Scripture says God caused Adam to go into a deep sleep and God took a rib from Adam and used the rib to make Eve. I can remember being taught in Sunday School that a man having one less rib than woman was proof that the story of Adam and Eve was true. Any doctor would tell you that both men and women each have two sets of ribs counting twelve ribs per set. I guess the question is, who should I believe; the doctor or the Sunday School teacher? I think I choose the doctor. Score one for science!

The Bible

The Bible:
Most Christians see the Bible as the infallible word of God. They hold the belief “if the Bible says it, I believe it and that settles it.” It pains me to admit that I held this belief for over thirty years of my life. Before we dig into what the Bible actually teaches, I wanted to give a brief history of the book.
The Bible was written by forty different authors over a period of fifteen hundred years in three different languages that the average American can’t read (sorry folks but it wasn’t written in English). The actual book itself was canonized in 325CE by the Council of Nicaea formed by Constantine. A group of men decided which books would make the cut and did not give an explanation as to why the others did not make it, i.e The Gospel of Thomas.
Christians today will stand and defend their beliefs using this book and quote scriptures as if they are fact. I find this to be ironic because in fact what they actually believe in is something that was written down some fifteen hundred years ago. There is no way to actually prove what was written down. All that can be proven is THAT it was written down. They are believing in a piece of papyrus paper that is really really old and just happens to have something written on it.
The texts in the Bible are, indisputably, written by human hands. Not a single word in the Bible was penned by God. The writers obtained their information through what is the equivalent of the game telephone; one person told another person who told another person and so on. If you have ever played this game as a child you know how easy it is to get words turned around. You start with the sentence “my car has white fenders” and the end result could be “my cat has long whiskers.” It’s just not fathomable that the words you read in the Bible are one hundred percent accurate. It is more plausible that a ton of information was lost, changed or added through multiple translations until it was finally printed in English.
Two Billion people are walking around with their hands firmly grasped around a book that in no way can be proven to be accurate yet they consider it to be the rules to which they live by. I can remember the acronym I was taught as a child for the Bible; Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth. Now as a non-believer I sit back and question these basic instructions. It is these basic instructions we will be focusing on in the future.

The Fall

The Lord God took the man and put him in the Garden of Eden to work it and take care of it. 16 And the Lord God commanded the man, “You are free to eat from any tree in the garden; 17 but you must not eat from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, for when you eat from it you will certainly die” (Genesis 2:15-17).

How screwed up is it that God’s very first dialog with his newly created man is a rule. Why not give a welcome or an introduction. Nope, not God, his first dialog is “okay man, listen, I’ve placed a tree in the middle of this garden that you are not allowed to eat from and if you should disobey me and eat the fruit of this tree you will die. Get it” Got it? Good!” At this point I wouldn’t had some questions but God didn’t give Adam the opportunity to ask questions. Kind of reminds me of my dad who would tell me “if I wanted you to know I would tell you” when I would ask why.  Wow, thanks God!

Why would God, who is supposed to be all-knowing and all-powerful, place the forbidden tree in the garden in the first place? It seems pretty obvious to me that God is setting them up for failure. Why not place the tree outside the garden, after all, he IS God and can do anything, right? Not only did God put the tree inside the garden, he allowed the serpent entrance for the sole purpose of tempting Eve. Really?

Concerning the serpent, why wasn’t Eve surprised by the talking snake? Even more so, why aren’t Christians surprised that their religion requires them to believe in talking animals? We will discuss the talking donkey in a later post. One thing that I want to point out is that the only tree God didn’t want them to eat from was the Tree of Knowledge. Why would God prefer his creation to live without knowledge? Could it possibly be because he knew once we had the ability think for ourselves we would see through all the bullshit religion teaches?

So here we are, Adam and Eve have enjoyed the sweet, luscious juice of the forbidden fruit and now, as God stated earlier, both of them should be laying on the ground dead. Instead of dying Eve notices Adam’s little soldier and Adam notices Eve’s delicate flower, so what did they do? They made covering out of leaves to cover their nakedness. Allow me to briefly pause here and bring something else to your attention; Genesis 3:21 says that after they ate of the tree He gave them their skin. How did they realize they were naked if they had no skin? What were they before, skeletons? Also the Bible goes into detail about how God opened up Adam and took a rib then closed up the wound but how can he close a wound when there is no skin to close?

After they ate of the tree God came strolling through the garden in the coolness of the day and hearing him coming they hid from him. God, being the all-knowing entity that he is asked “where are you?” Shouldn’t God know where they are? After all we were taught that he knows everything. Then he ask “why are you hiding?” Once again another question he already knows the answer too. What most Christians fail to realize is that according to their teachings, God knows everything that will happen now and until the end of time, which tells me that God knew they would fall and created them anyway.

Why would God ask them how they knew they were naked? Duh! because now they have knowledge. Oh those pesky humans, how dare they have the desire to think for themselves.  At this point the blame game begins. Adam blames Eve as if she had a gun to his head and forces him to eat and Eve blamed the talking snake that God allowed into the garden. Adam had to blame Eve. By blaming Eve the Bible would be justified in it’s mistreatment of women. Then the bible could go on and on about how the women was deceived first and then deceived man. What a crock of crap! Can this get anymore insane? Of course it can and it does. Find out how in my next post.